In this latest installment of House of Stewart, I will basically tell you I have no idea what's happening :/
Okay, so I haven't heard anything definitive from the summer hosting program we had applied to - bummer. When I called a week and a half ago, they said they weren't sure if there would be any Ethiopian kids here this summer. When I spoke to the social worker, she hadn't heard either, so again - BUMMER.
What does this mean to us? I guess it means we are going to have to start looking at another agency, maybe. I'm not sure if the agency just isn't communicating with us on this particular project or if they are generally bad at communicating. If they aren't good at communicating with clients, I want a different agency.
We went to a meeting for adoptive parents last week and we did get some suggestions on agencies as well as some strong advice to research, research, research. I COMPLETELY agree with us needing to research, I just feel at a loss for how that needs to happen. I don't know what I am looking for. The couples who have gone before us all went through the same agency (which is now, unfortunately, bankrupt).
On another note, our fundraising is going slow - but steady! Another coworker gave us an unexpected donation, that was really cool. I sold a few more necklaces and Alan is doing a sushi party this weekend, so things are moving in the right direction. We just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other and move, right? So, we are having the home study packet sent to us and I guess we get that started (I know, friends, I know, I should have started a long time ago, but I was kinda hoping for this summer hosting thing to go through).
So, keep praying for us. Pray that we figure (some of) this stuff out and that we make a good decision when it comes to choosing an agency. Pray for our kids that are out there now, pray that whereever they are they feel loved, that they are as safe as possible and that they are hopeful that someone out there loves them and that they will be part of a family again.
Monday, April 22, 2013
Friday, April 12, 2013
What Happens If...
I had someone ask a me a good question earlier this week. It was one I had thought about, in a sense, but not really pondered, so to speak. I was talking about the possibility of hosting an adoptable child this summer and she asked, "what if you don't like the child?" Hmmmm...good question. Like I said, I had thought about it, but never really pondered (considered, thought deeply about, contemplated) the question. So, I guess now I will.
What if we don't "like" the child we adopt? What if we end up choosing a child from a picture and not a month-long experience? What if after a month the child turns into something other-worldly? What if, what if, what if...
I imagine that when you have a kid (in the "traditional" sense of the word) there is some worry about not liking the kid. I know, because I've heard parents express this fear. Usually, though, people talk about the fact that after the hard work is over (that is, birthing a child) something magically happens - it's called oxytocin - that bonds you to your child. That magical oxytocin is also at work during breastfeeding. And so it goes that the worry of "liking" the child is explained :)
Obviously, since we want older kids and I am not giving birth, nor will I (akwardly) be breastfeeding, there will be no "magic" happening. So tell me, parent friends, do you have older children that you don't like? I am pretty sure that the answer is yes - unless my family circle was just weird (which is totally possible). I would hear things like, "It's a good thing I love you because I don't like you right now!" Which leads, I think, into the question of love...what if we don't love the child we adopt? This is where prayer comes in, I guess. We will be praying that God will bring the right kid(s) to us, praying to understand that He knows who we need and who needs us, praying that we would love "the least of these" and that no matter what, we realize that love is a choice.
Thanks, friends, for being there for us and spurring on our thought processes when it comes to adopting. We realize that in no way will be ever be prepared for what is going to happen, as I think most new parents are never quite prepared. Please continue praying for us as we begin this adventure. Pray that we are able to tackle the tough issues ahead of us. Pray that we would be certain when it comes to the kids that God has for us. Pray that we will not only like, but love our kids unconditionally.
What if we don't "like" the child we adopt? What if we end up choosing a child from a picture and not a month-long experience? What if after a month the child turns into something other-worldly? What if, what if, what if...
I imagine that when you have a kid (in the "traditional" sense of the word) there is some worry about not liking the kid. I know, because I've heard parents express this fear. Usually, though, people talk about the fact that after the hard work is over (that is, birthing a child) something magically happens - it's called oxytocin - that bonds you to your child. That magical oxytocin is also at work during breastfeeding. And so it goes that the worry of "liking" the child is explained :)
Obviously, since we want older kids and I am not giving birth, nor will I (akwardly) be breastfeeding, there will be no "magic" happening. So tell me, parent friends, do you have older children that you don't like? I am pretty sure that the answer is yes - unless my family circle was just weird (which is totally possible). I would hear things like, "It's a good thing I love you because I don't like you right now!" Which leads, I think, into the question of love...what if we don't love the child we adopt? This is where prayer comes in, I guess. We will be praying that God will bring the right kid(s) to us, praying to understand that He knows who we need and who needs us, praying that we would love "the least of these" and that no matter what, we realize that love is a choice.
Thanks, friends, for being there for us and spurring on our thought processes when it comes to adopting. We realize that in no way will be ever be prepared for what is going to happen, as I think most new parents are never quite prepared. Please continue praying for us as we begin this adventure. Pray that we are able to tackle the tough issues ahead of us. Pray that we would be certain when it comes to the kids that God has for us. Pray that we will not only like, but love our kids unconditionally.
Thursday, April 4, 2013
Where Are You At?
As I was sitting, thinking about what I would title this post, I started typing in "Where Are You At?" thinking to myself that the question was about where Alan and I are in the process, then I also realized that to me, it meant, where are you - child who will someday come home with us - at?
So, here is the answer to the first question. The organization that we originally had planned on adopting through filed for bankruptcy a few months ago. Luckily for us, we were in the VERY beginning stages and were really not "out" much money. On a side note, some of our friends were very far into their process and have lost time and money - PLEASE pray for them! Anyhow, back on track, Alan and I will have to decide on another agency to go through.
We are considering another agency and so we have applied to do a summer hosting program! That means if we are accepted for the hosting program, we would have a month to spend with an adoptable child that could potentially become a part of our family...OMGsh!!!
The program is kind of cool. It places adoptable orphans from the Phillipines and Ethiopia with families in the US in hopes of finding them families (unfortunately, we do not qualify, at this time, to adopt from the Phillipines - bummer!). The host families do not have to adopt, they just have to be open to adoption or to helping the child meet other potential families. While they are here, they will receive some routine medical care - eye exam, dental exam, etc., have some fun with other kids and get to have a great "summer vacation," if you will.
As for that second question...all I know is this: you are out there, you are alive right now, maybe you are in the orphanage, maybe you are still on the streets. Where ever you are, we love you and we are looking forward to meeting you (and hopefully a sibling!) someday soon.
So, here is the answer to the first question. The organization that we originally had planned on adopting through filed for bankruptcy a few months ago. Luckily for us, we were in the VERY beginning stages and were really not "out" much money. On a side note, some of our friends were very far into their process and have lost time and money - PLEASE pray for them! Anyhow, back on track, Alan and I will have to decide on another agency to go through.
We are considering another agency and so we have applied to do a summer hosting program! That means if we are accepted for the hosting program, we would have a month to spend with an adoptable child that could potentially become a part of our family...OMGsh!!!
The program is kind of cool. It places adoptable orphans from the Phillipines and Ethiopia with families in the US in hopes of finding them families (unfortunately, we do not qualify, at this time, to adopt from the Phillipines - bummer!). The host families do not have to adopt, they just have to be open to adoption or to helping the child meet other potential families. While they are here, they will receive some routine medical care - eye exam, dental exam, etc., have some fun with other kids and get to have a great "summer vacation," if you will.
As for that second question...all I know is this: you are out there, you are alive right now, maybe you are in the orphanage, maybe you are still on the streets. Where ever you are, we love you and we are looking forward to meeting you (and hopefully a sibling!) someday soon.
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