Having a Backyard for My Birthday

Many of you know that for the last couple of weeks we have been working hard on creating a nice space in our back yard. I mean, really, there wasn't much of anything in the yard...yeah, really...nothing. Well, wait, unless you count weeds...and dirt...and rocks of varying sizes in random spots all over the yard which is not conducive to growing grass.

Yep, this is what we had. The pic of
the front yard is actually one year
AFTER we did it...it still needed work!

We have almost been in our house for five years now and we have not had a "yard" that whole time. We have made some progress though. We always knew the landscaping would be a slow and steady thing for us. We are pretty budget conscious and I couldn't just charge a whole yard on a credit card! Still, I kept having thoughts that "oh, maybe THIS is the year!" and it never was. So, little by little, we did some of this and some of that. We saved money from tax returns every year to do some work. 





For the record, 10 x 25 is a huge
patio for first-time DIYers!

In 2011, the year after we moved in, we made a patio off the back door - that was a big undertaking for our first project! We also managed to start a front yard that year. I looks so lovely now! Then later that summer, it got HOT and Alan asked why we didn't get air conditioning instead of a patio...oops! So, in 2012 we purchased an air conditioner and that was our big home improvement project. In 2013 we finished our front yard landscaping by creating a space that is supposed to look like a dry river bed or a "river of rocks" along the side of the house and I felt great that we were no longer the eyesore of the neighborhood!



This was in 2013 right after we
finished the dry river bed.

But every year, I still wanted a backyard, a place to hang out and enjoy. I had thoughts of having a movie with friends in the backyard for my birthday for the last three years at least! I want to love my yard. It's hard to enjoy the nice patio when our view consists of a combination of living and dying weeds and brown dirt. I always hoped this backyard thing would happen soon. Two major barriers though - one, we "needed" a retaining wall. If we were going to do that, we'd need to install it BEFORE the yard looked nice; two, we "needed" to install sprinklers if we were going to invest in grass. We have a large yard and I had nightmares of me dragging the sprinkler around said yard and even forgetting that it's on (like I frequently do in the front yard!). Those were finished in 2014!

2015 - our patio "garage".

So, 2015, here we are, poised and ready for a backyard. We need to do three major things: level the yard and prep the soil, add river rocks around the perimeter of the yard and then hydroseed. And we were prepared to do it! There we were, the weekend after our anniversary and we were leveling and prepping the soil. We rented the skid steer and Alan and Jen did a great job leveling out the mess around the fence created by the great Craigslist fiasco of 2012ish and then he used the attachment to run over the whole yard to prep the soil. This soil conditioner attachment tills up the weeds, softens the ground, pulverizes small rocks and sends bigger ones to the side. Did I mention we had rocks? Like, along the lines of 12" hunks of flat sandstone? Well, mostly pieces in the 4-6" range, but rocks nonetheless.

Separating rock and weeds sucks.

After Alan uses the soil conditioner on the yard, we have to rake. We're raking piles of rocks and there are pieces of weed debris intermingled with rocks. I HAD to try and separate them so we could put them in the right trash cans. We had piles everywhere! So, there I was, in my backyard, raking my heart out thinking about how great it will be to FINALLY have a yard for my birthday. That this will be the birthday that my friends get to come to OUR house and hang out in OUR backyard. All of this thinking has me so excited and while I am thinking, I hear the neighbor kids talking...



"My spirit animal is a rat because I steal things!" (I think the other one had a fox for his spirit animal!)

And they are jumping on the trampoline...

"I am going to be an evil penguin but when you kill me I turn good." (Jen said you can't have evil penguins.)

And then the sprinkler turns on under the trampoline...

"Go get me a towel because I'm cold!" (she was a bit bossy)...

Front yard 2015 (top left and middle)
The backyard in progress (rest!) 

And then I realize...it's really not about my birthday, and it never has been. This house has always been about starting a family....five years in the making...we wanted to have a place where we could bring a couple kids home, let them run around in a big, safe yard and have fun; a  place where memories would be created and they would feel loved. This yard isn't about me, it's about them! And so there I was, raking up rocks and weeds and praying for our kids...kids who may never have seen this thing called "grass" that I have been longing for...kids who really would be fine playing out in the dirt...kids who might be waiting for us right now...and I began praying for them...and praying for us.

Did I mention the "prison shanks"
we found in the yard?

It will still be nice to have grass for my birthday, but in the long run, I am thankful that I am reminded that this was never about me...and that our hope is that this is a house that, ultimately, glorifies Him...

How Much Paperwork Do We Realły Have Left?

Let me start by saying that our anniversary is tomorrow, we'll, at least as I sit here on Monday and write this it's tomorrow - who knows how long it will take me to compose this post! Anyhow, June 2, 2015 marks TWENTY YEARS with my amazing hubby, Alan!! Seriously, as I look back it doesn't seem like it has been that long. Often times, I still feel so young - yes, I get that age is relative, but most people who have been married for 20 years are at least half-way through their parenting years and here we are, not even started. I don't feel like I'm 37, but when I think about my age, it makes me wish that this adoption thing would happen more quickly, you know? 

Yes, Homeland Security Has to Say, "Yes."

In February we submitted our I-600A: Application for Advance Processing of Orphan Petition. This is a form that gives us permission from Homeland Security to adopt foreign children and emigrate them to the U.S. Shortly after submitting the application, we rceived a request for additional documentation with an 87 day window for submission. Eighty-seven days...no big deal, right? So, fast-forward some 50 days...ish. I thought we had what we needed...I really did. Yes, the letter said "certified court disposition" but really, is that any different from a background check saying that we have no arrests? Um, yes! And thankfully, our social worker caught it for us! 

I Really Wasn't Trying to Slack.

So, we needed a letter saying that there is no record of Alan having been arrested and gone to court and for a traffic violation (yeah, that's another story, for another day, but suffice it to say - ALWAYS use your full name...always). You know, when they wipe things off the record, it's hard to figure out who to call to verify this fact! Anyhow, Alan made LOTS of calls...lots. Finally, he got a hold of the right person around April 30th...21 days before we have to get this to the government. The woman checks the records and verifies that there is no record. This takes a few days to get figured out. She mails it to us on Friday May 8th...my sister verifies this as she went and paid the fee for us. It's coming from Great Falls, 3 1/2 hours away, no reason why we shouldn't have this letter by the 11th, giving us plenty of time to get our paperwork in...the problem is, it's not in the mailbox on the 11th, or the 12th, or the 13th...so Alan calls..."if it's not there on the 14th call." So he called and had to leave a message, along with 3 other messages the following day. Finally, he got a hold of her on the 15th. She certifies two new letters, but the mail has already run, it's Friday, she can't get it out until Monday...we need it Tuesday...not going to happen. UGH, frustration!

Thankful again that I have a sister in Great Falls who goes to the court house, picks up the letter and then sends it next-day air on Monday...meanwhile...our mail had come and the letters that had been sent ten days prior finally showed up. Guess what...they spelled his name wrong, on these official court documents - more frustration, especially for Alan :/ Our social worker told us to go ahead and submit what we had so we could get it in on time (did you know it costs upwards of $50 to overnight something to Missouri??) and to just try to get new letters - just in case (on a side note, we went to GF and it took her TWO MORE TIMES to get the letter right!).

If you're skipping to the good part, here it is:

I am usually so on top of everything, I don't like to wait if I know it needs to be done. I really don't know how all this got away from me...So, after waiting a little too long to get paperwork together, after spending three+ weeks to get what should have been a simple letter, after getting the paperwork there with just one day to spare, this afternoon, on the eve of our 20th anniversary, we got a letter from the Dept. of Homeland Security...

Alas...I must trust God's timing, of this I remind myself quite frequently. Those who know me probably know that I have told God that the best possible court dates would include anytime between June and September, Christmas break, spring break...you know, the dates that would work out perfectly for a teacher! While a teeny part of me believes that He might give me a "yes" to my best possible dates, I, again, have to remind myself that these are HIS plans, not my plans, that HIS ways are higher than my ways. Isaiah 55:9 says, "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." His thoughts are higher than my thoughts...He knows the end from the beginning and He is to be trusted, as is His timing.